


Gods of the Godless

by DefaltManifesto



Series: Please Hit Restart [3]
Category: Pacific Rim (2013)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Anal Sex, Canon-Typical Violence, D/s Relationships, Ghost Drifting, M/M, Male-Female Friendship, New Kaiju, Oral Sex, Politics, more tags added later, new jaegers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-08-29
Updated: 2014-12-04
Packaged: 2018-02-15 05:12:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 14,328
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2216985
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DefaltManifesto/pseuds/DefaltManifesto
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>With the Breach reopened, Herc has to navigate world politics, broken Jaeger pilots, and a Kaiju that just doesn't want to let a certain hyperactive scientist go. And it certainly wouldn't hurt to actually close the Breach for good.</p><p>A/N: Told mainly from Herc and Newt's perspectives</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So this story was never supposed to happen and yet here we are, whoops. No idea what my pattern of updating will be but I'll try for at least one chapter a month if not every two weeks. Also, title taken from Paradise Lost by Hollywood Undead.

[The tumblr](http://schizzar.tumblr.com)

 

Hercules Hansen was having one hell of a day. It had started with his phone ringing off the hook with every diplomat of every god damn major country demanding a private meeting to discuss the fact that the breach had reopened and nearly every military branch in the world was just waiting for the world to go to hell in a hand basket. All in all, it was a lot to take in given that the PPDC had been dissolved two months ago and he was in goddamn retirement.

But the world, cruel mistress that it was, didn't give two shits what Hercules Hansen wanted.

Herc opened the door to his small apartment and let the first of twenty diplomats scheduled to meet him in the next hour inside. This one was the United States representative, because of course the fucking Americans were so concerned about being the first one involved they somehow managed to get to him before the Australian one.

"Pleasure to meet with you face to face, Marshal Hansen," the man said, reaching out to shake his hand. "Though I do wish it was under better circumstances. I'm John Phillips."

He was black, dressed in a perfectly tailored suit and he was shaved bald. His face was quite similar to Stacker's, though Herc supposed that could just be wishful thinking, especially since that was where the similarities ended. Herc couldn't quite believe they were letting such scrawny men into positions of power, but he also knew those thoughts were just a product of how tired and grumpy he was.

Herc shook the man's hand. "Take a seat. I don't have any coffee brewed so you'll have to go without."

John glanced around, a look of disdain on his face as he took in the peeling floral wallpaper, cracked tile on the counter tops, and the single flickering light on the ceiling, because the rest had already gone out. It was a faulty fuse, not the bulbs. Herc kept telling himself he'd get around to fixing it, but honestly he didn't care much for that sort of work anymore.

"That's fine. How quickly can the PPDC be up and running again?" John asked.

"Straight to business then?" Herc sat down in one of the rickety metal chairs at the small wooden table. "Wasn't America the first one to insist we decommission the PPDC and the Jaeger Program? You had all those rich donors in the steel industry if I remember correctly. Wanted to funnel all your money to them. Feel free to correct me if I'm wrong."

John hesitated. "I...am not at liberty to discuss why the United States of America made the choices it did."

"So then why the hell are they interested in the PPDC running again? They've got a wall they can keep making, don't they?"

"We need a first line of defense in case of any immediate attacks," John said. "The United States of -"

"Just say the U.S., seriously do I look like a guy who gives a rat's ass about propriety?"

"Right, well the U.S. is willing to be the first to begin funding the revival of the PPDC and Jaeger Program if we are allowed primary control over the bigger decisions. We just want to know how quickly that can be done," John said.

"I'm not sure. I'll have to wait until I hear back from the other countries before I make any decisions. We still have the dossiers on all of the people who were previously employed at the Chinese Shatterdome. The rest are long gone, though I'm sure the NSA has those all stored away somewhere so we could contact them as well," Herc said. The NSA jab was of course just to watch the man squirm some more. He really needed a nap. "As far as Jaeger pilots go, I've got a few I can contact but I can't guarantee any of them will be interested in rejoining this fight. They weren't the last time. In fact, I believe they told Pentecoast to take 'his righteous stick and shove it up his ass'."

"Kennedy LaRue, correct? It was all over the news," John said.

"Yeah, that was her. I've got about five people that come to mind. I'll try and contact them immediately. As far as Jaegers go, I believe the Chinese government has restored the Crimson Typhoon."

"That information is classified!"

Herc stared at him. "So it is."

"Well, yes, but how did-"

"I can rope together a team to pilot her if something comes through the Breach," Herc said. He got to his feet and unhooked his phone from its charger on the counter before flipping through his contacts. "You just get me permission from the Chinese government to reopen the Shatterdome and to use the Crimson Typhoon. Of course, that's just the start. We're going to need a coordinated global effort to get the Jaeger Program back up and running the way it was."

"I can't speak for the other countries yet-"

There was a knock at the door and Herc got to his feet. He opened it and gave a customary bow before letting the Chinese diplomat inside.

"Well, you two can talk about the revival of the Jaeger Program and funding. It was mainly funded by your two countries the first few months the program started," Herc said.

"How far apart did you schedule these meetings?" John asked.

"Ten minutes," Herc said. "Before long we'll all be here. You can move to the living room if you'd like."

John looked like he was going to be sick.

 

-.-

 

"I don't know why this is necessary," Newt said, for quite possibly the ninth time.

Hermann had long stopped dignifying Newt with a response. It had been less than twenty-four hours since they had called the German Embassy about what they'd felt, eighteen hours since their statements had been confirmed by various types of radar, and thirteen hours since they had been kidnapped outside Hannibal's shop by some sort of federal agents and carted off to some place underground. Newt was entirely sure because he'd been blind folded until he'd been tossed into a cell with Hermann. Their blindfolds were removed then, but the room was completely dark with not even a small light to indicate where the door was.

"Possibly because if we can see the Kaiju than they can see us," Hermann said after a few moments. "Anything we know, the Kaiju will."

"Oh my, an actual answer this time instead of disgruntled grumbling!"

"Newton."

Newt's mouth clicked shut and he went back to lying flat on the ground. "We should be out there though. We know what's going on best."

"I would say you do, I barely get flashes, not like you described," Hermann said. "She doesn't... _talk_ to me."

"It's more really strong feelings, not actual words."

"Whatever. Do you think your thug of a boyfriend will be breaking us out anytime soon?" Hermann asked.

"Probably not. He doesn't have the resources. Well, he does, but he's not the clingy type so I don't think he wants to start any international incidents over me," Newt said.

They fell into silence once more, broken up only by the occasional grumbling of his stomach. Anxiety usually made him want to babble but after everything they'd been through in the last twenty-four hours, there was still one thing that scared him the most, and that was the thing that scared him into silence.

Otachi was gone. Usually he had some rumblings of her in the back of his mind, and after a near year of never being alone in his own head, the feeling of being truly alone was worse than the breach reopening.

 

-.-

 

Herc checked his watch as he sipped his coffee. The impromptu diplomatic conference in his living was actually going well and since the entire world was freaking out, they seemed to be more interested in getting something _done_ instead of worrying about the politics of it all.

The Chinese diplomat, Xander Feng, got to his feet and left the living room to stand beside Herc.

"The Hong Kong Shatterdome is still in working condition. Crimson Typhoon was also restored for cultural purposes, but we can assemble the full crew within twelve hours, possibly sooner though I make no guarantees. We would need your help contacting former pilots," Feng said.

"Works well enough for me, but quick question," Herc said, raising his voice enough that all other conversation ceased. "When are you lot going to contact your leaders and get me an official meeting with them?"

There was a beat of silence, and then every person was on their phone and the clamor of talking rose in volume. Herc turned back towards Feng. "You get me a direct line to your president. We need that Jaeger ready to go now. I'll make some calls."

"Right away."

Herc headed into the bathroom, locking the door behind him as he pulled out his phone and thumbed down to Raleigh's number. Everything in him screamed for him not to do it. After Yancy died, Raleigh did everything he could to get away from the PPDC only to be dragged back in to suffer even more losses. The man had given the world everything he had, and now, Herc had to ask him to give anything that was left.

He hit send and swallowed his guilt to deal with later. Raleigh answered on the first ring.

"Figured you'd be calling," Raleigh said. His voice was rough, strained. "What's going on?"

"There's talk of re-instituting the PPDC," Herc said. "We're trying to come up with a strategy to help with any immediate threats. Crimson Typhoon is...repaired."

"Lemme guess. You're wondering if I'm interested."

"Hoping, yeah."

"Because you know Mako will say yes if you ask and you're compatible with everyone, so you just need someone who can Drift with her," Raleigh said. "You know, the triplets are the only ones who have ever successfully had a three person Drift."

"It's not even a sure thing that we'll even be dropping and at this point, either we try and Drift or the world starts nuking the thing," Herc said. "It's just a plan in case something happens before we're ready."

"Which it will. Probably within the next few hours, too," Raleigh said.

Herc closed his eyes. "You can say no. I wouldn't hold it against you. I know this isn't the sort of thing you're willing to step back into and I won't make you."

Raleigh laughed, a short and bitter sound. "That's all you got? No appeals to my patriotic side? No grand speech of inspiration?"

"I'm not that kind of man and you know it, Becket," Herc said.

"Yeah, I know," Raleigh said. "Buy me a flight and I'll be wherever you need me."

"Thank you."

For a long moment, Raleigh was near silent, his quiet breathing the only sound. "When does this end Herc? They've taken everything from us."

"I don't know. Wish I did." Herc coughed, trying to clear the lump in his throat. "I'll get you flight details once you get me your location."

A loud rap at the door cut Raleigh's words off and Herc hit the end call button before opening the door to reveal Feng.

"The G8 leaders will be assembling in the Hong Kong Shatterdome. We will head there now," Feng said.

Herc drew up Mako's number and hit call. "Then I'll talk and pack."

 

-.-

 

Newt rolled onto his back, wincing when he realized that such a move did nothing to help the muscles that were cramping in his back. He rolled onto his stomach instead, but that served only to send a shooting pain down his spine to the tips of his toes. A few feet away, Hermann hissed in pain.

"You too?" Newt asked, curling up in a ball as another shock of pain shuddered through him.        

"If you mean do I feel painful contractions, than yes."

"Great."

 

-.-

 

Eight hours later, Herc touched his feet to the Chinese Shatterdome helipad for the first time in nearly six months. He'd been the last to leave, the last to shut down all the power. It ached deep in his bones without Max by his side, without Chuck's rough, antagonistic voice in his ear. The sick feeling in his chest tempted him to turn right back around and demand to be flown back to Sydney but he knew he was stuck in it now.

Mako was the only one waiting for him on the helipad. She held two manila folders stuffed full of papers, one of which she flipped open as Herc approached. The only thing that had changed in the months since they'd last seen each other were the grief lines around her eyes, a look Herc was used to seeing in the mirror, but one that hurt to see in someone he cared so much about.

"I've prepared information on the Crimson Typhoon. The Chinese government restored her to her original capabilities, but they have also included a few other weapons," Mako said. "I included a list of former pilots who are probably Drift Compatible with Raleigh and I who I think will be willing to come back."

Herc flipped open the folder and began to glance over the specs. "I was going to pilot her with you."

"You're the Marshal now, sir. You can't," Mako said. "We don't even know if anyone can."

"I can if a Kaiju decides to come through before anyone else gets here."

They headed into the Shatterdome and it took a serious amount of concentration to head for the hanger that housed Crimson Typhoon instead of Striker Eureka. As if there had even been anything left of her after Pitfall. As if Chuck and Stacker-

"Tendo?" Herc was surprised to see the man in the control room, hair slicked back with his usual polka-dotted bow ties and open smile. "They called you in?"

"I did work Pitfall. Makes me a bit more prepared I guess." Tendo shrugged, then stepped forward to embrace Herc in a tight hug. "Good to see you again, even if I would prefer better circumstances."

"Same to you. Where's the rest of your team then?" Herc asked.

"Still arriving. Where's the dog?" Tendo asked.

"Left him at home for now. Didn't have time to pack his things," Herc said.

"Makes sense. Cheung is coming with the rest of Crimson's team by the way. Thought you guys should have a heads up before he arrives," Tendo said.

Mako straightened and when Herc glanced at her, there was a look of equal shock on her face.

"Cheung is alive? Since when?" Herc demanded.

"The Chinese government did the clean up after that fight. Stacker was too busy at the time to bother with why they offered to do it," Tendo said. "Guess he survived and they kept it all hush, hush."

"Is he okay?" Mako asked. "His brothers...he felt them die, didn't he?"

Herc sucked in a tight breath. "I guess we'll see when he gets here."

There was a knock on the control room door and one of the army grunts walked in. "The members of the G8 are all assembled in the main meeting room at the center of the Shatterdome. They request your presence immediately."

"Right of course. Lead the way," Herc said.

It was a ten minute walk to get to the center of the Shatterdome from where they were, and then another ten minutes to get through the different security details who all decided they needed to check the three of them over with their own tools before finally allowing them into the boardroom. There were ten people seated around the large boardroom table. All of the G8 members were there as well as the Chinese President and Feng.

"President Henderson, President Yongzheng," Herc said, giving the American and Chinese leaders each a short nod before taking his seat. Mako and Tendo took the seats on either side of him.

Feng sat beside Yongzheng but he got to his feet once the rest had sat down. "Marshal Hansen, may I introduce you to President Garcin of France, Prime Minister Tucker of the United Kingdom, President Yasuda of Japan, President Russo of Canada, President Tocci of Italy, President Gessner of Germany, and President Milkovich of Russia."

Herc gave them each a nod in turn. President Yongzheng was an older man, somewhere in his seventies if Herc remembered correctly, but he still had a full head of hair, which was meticulously slicked back. Henderson has the same meticulous appearance but he was soft around the edges and had the constant expression of a petulant child. Garcin and Gessner were the only female leaders at the table. He'd always admired Gessner. She had the stereotypical German looks, long blonde hair and blue eyes, and also had the ability to cut through the heart of nearly any matter, though from what Stacker told him she took her time before saying anything.

Garcin was generally more vocal then the others, though Herc remembered more than one complaint about her pretentious attitude. Russo, Tucker, and Tocci didn't say much in comparison usually, and Yasuda agreed with Gessner on almost everything. Ever since K-Day, Japan and Germany were closely allied, most of the Japanese refugees fleeing their homes as the damage increased. Now, since the Pacific Rim had been silent for months, they had begun moving back in larger numbers to their home country, and Germany continued to help support them financially. It was an odd alliance, but it worked.

Then, there was President Milkovich. Herc had worked with him intimately in the first weeks after the Jaeger Program was decommissioned, running back door meetings for Stacker to get as much unofficial information about who they could potentially be funded by. He was a sneaky man, similar in looks to his predecessor Putin. Frankly, he made the hair on the back of Herc's neck stand up, but he wanted the survival of the world just as much as he did, and didn't care as much about profit.

"Glad you could make it on such short notice, I'm sure it was hell for your security."

That got him a chuckle, tense as it was.

"So, down to business then. It's come to my attention that Wei Cheung has survived," Herc said as he opened the folder Mako had given him. "Which, given that during that time, the PPDC was not operating under any actual governmental regulations, I'll forgive the fact that no one informed me. Now would be a good time to mention anything else you've all been hiding before I figure it out on my own."

Mako hid her smile by ducking her head as the various leaders shot accusatory looks towards Yongzheng.

"Under our request, President Yongzheng also retrieved the comm pod of Cherno Alpha. Both the Kaidonovskys survived," Milkovich said.

"And are they able to fight?" Herc asked.

"We don't even know if we're going to restart the Jaeger Program," Henderson said. "I don't give a damn what happened last time, it _doesn't_ work. We can't pour money into-"

"Okay, just stop," Herc said. He got to his feet and leaned forward on the table on his knuckles. "I am _not_ Stacker Pentecoast. I am not diplomatic. The survival of this world is not going to be compromised because you have steel companies you want to appease, President Henderson. That's why the wall, which failed I might add, was built and we all know that. Whatever business is currently paying you off, I'm not that interested in hearing from. Have I made myself clear?"

"How dare-" Henderson started to get to his feet.

"Sit. Down." Herc met the man's eyes, expression hard, and he watched as the fury in Henderson's eyes drained away before he sat back down, unable to meet Herc's gaze any longer. "The Jaeger Program works. We can build Jaegers faster than a wall and you can't modify a wall to evolve at the speed the Kaiju evolve to us. We don't know _when_ they're coming. We have only one battle ready Jaeger-"

"We do?" Russo asked. "Sorry, I must have missed that bit."

"Crimson Typhoon was fully restored with added weapons," Mako said.

"Purely for cultural and historical reasons," Yongzheng said.

"Right, I'm sure you had _no_ intention of using that in an inappropriate way," Garcin said with a roll of her eyes.

"You can sort out your diplomatic bullshit later. For now, we have a threat to deal with. Does the PPDC have the funding it needs to reopen the Hong Kong Shatterdome?"

"Germany will provide funding for the operation of one Jaeger," Gessner said. "Of course, this will only continue if the PPDC does not represent any one country. No one government will have jurisdiction over the PPDC. Not one. The rest of the costs will have to be split among the other countries here, at least in the short term."

"Can we all agree to that then?" Herc asked, glancing around the table.

"We should take an official vote," Garcin said.

"Seconded," Russo said with a raise of his hand.

"All in favor of funding the PPDC in the same structure as 2021 for one month split equally among the nine of us?" Yasuda asked.

Eight hands rose and Herc raised an eyebrow at Henderson, whose hands remained stubbornly in his lap.

"All who oppose?"

Henderson abstained.

"It passes," Yasuda said. "All in favor of the PPDC remaining free of the control of any one country?"

This time, all nine hands rose.

"Well, good then," Gessner said. "A month of funding will give us and the rest of the UN time to work out a proper budget. For now, I think we can all agree that you should do whatever necessary to get a first line of defense up and running."

Henderson looked like he wanted to say something to object, but he managed to keep his mouth shut.

"Do you have any requests as far as personnel, Marshal Hansen?" Gessner asked.

"Yeah, actually, if I could?" Tendo asked, glancing at Herc. He continued once he got a nod in response. "Dr. Newton Geiszler and Dr. Hermann Gottlieb. They're the ones that notified Herc and the German Embassy who in turn notified the Chinese government but we haven't heard from them since. We're going to need their expertise."

"We have not heard from them since first contact," Yongzheng said. "Once they've been located-"

"They were last seen with Hannibal Chau," Milkovich said. "He's contacted me twice since they were taken. He said there were Americans lurking around his shop and that they were the ones to jump Dr. Geiszler and Dr. Gottlieb. He has been unable to locate them since." Milkovich rapped his knuckles on the table and glanced over at Henderson.

The American President's face grew red and he pointed a shaking finger towards Milkovich. "Are you insinuating-"

"Yes, I am," Milkovich said.

"President Henderson, did you take Dr. Geiszler and Dr. Gottlieb into custody?" Herc asked.

Henderson clenched his jaw and then slammed a fist down onto the table. "I did it for the safety of the world."

"Oh, what a time for your concern for the world to come out," Garcin said, voice growing louder to override Henderson's protests.

"Those two men are linked to the Breach somehow! We can't just let them walk free, they could be working for the enemy!" Henderson shouted.

"My God, do you _actually_ listen to yourself speak?" Russo asked. Herc was surprised by the amount of backbone the Canadian President seemed to be developing, given the poor man's track record. "If they're experts on the Breach, we need them."

"I will not release them," Henderson said.

"At least not until someone offers a high enough price," Garcin said with another roll of her eyes.

"Either you release them or I let Hannibal Chau know we won't stop him if he chooses to break them out," Yongzheng said. "Now is not the time for your petty politics. The world is in danger."

"Fine-"

The meeting room door opened and one of the heads of security stepped inside, nodding his head towards Prime Minister Tucker. "I realize you said that you were not to be bothered, sir, but one of the techs has just informed us that a Kaiju Category 4 has emerged from the Breach."

Herc was on his feet in seconds, overriding the sudden clamor from the world's now panicked leaders with a wave of his hand. "Tendo, get to the control room. Mako, has Raleigh arrived yet?"

Mako glanced down at her phone. "He has just arrived sir."

"Good. We'll suit up and get out there," Herc said. "Ladies, gentleman, I suggest you go find your bunkers. And someone get me Geiszler and Gottlieb!"


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Blargh, here is chapter 2. I know it's all fast paced at the moment, but next chapter things are gonna slow down a bit and characters will actually get to interact more, so don't worry.

[The tumblr](http://schizzar.tumblr.com)

 

The door slammed open and light spilled in. Newt turned his face into his arm, blinking rapidly to try and adjust his eyes as the bright light sent another shock of pain through him. He still wasn't able to move when a hand grabbed his forearm and tugged him forward. He bit the inside of his cheek to stop himself from making a sound, but given Hermann's outraged shrieking, Newt figured the other scientist hadn't thought that through.

Apparently, being at the center of hostage situations came in handy. Captors generally hated it when their prisoners made too much noise, and that lesson had earned Newt a few scars so he wouldn't forget.

"Keep your eyes shut and do not attempt to remove the blindfolds," a loud and booming voice ordered.

"Yeah, okay but tone it down. We're sort of in a lot of pain and I mean, my head is pounding so-"

Newt yelped when a hand cuffed the side of his head. Just because he _knew_ to keep his mouth shut didn't mean he always _did_.

"We're moving you to the Shatterdome. Try not to encourage my men to cause an unfortunate accident on the way in."

Newt bit his other cheek to stop another smartass response. They were led down a myriad of hallways and each step grew progressively worse as the time between the waves of pain shortened. He wanted to reach out to Hermann. The stab of the other man's cane down on the marble floor was louder each time it hit, and Hermann's breathing grew more labored and harsh until finally Newt yanked back on the arm leading him.

"You guys are in charge, okay, got it, but let him lean on me okay?" Newt asked. "We've been in pain for like, two hours."

"Fine, but no sudden movements."

Newt shifted over to Hermann, able to tell where he was even without sight, which was a bit disconcerting because he was pretty confident that meant they were Ghost Drifting. He wrapped an arm around Hermann's waist and the man slumped against him, his usual pride falling to the wayside. They continued on and after a few more minutes a door to the outside world opened and brought with it a breath of somewhat fresher air.

"Missed me?" Newt almost collapsed at the sound of Hannibal's voice.

 _"Yes_."

"Who the fuck are you?" Newt's captor demanded.

"Take 'em."

Newt tugged Hermann close and threw them both to the ground before tearing off his blindfold. Kaelyn and a few of Hannibal's other goons stormed in, kicking down some of the agents before they could draw their weapons. Kaelyn shoved who Newt assumed was the leader up against the wall and pressed her katana to his neck.

"Would you like a clean up operation?" Kaelyn asked.

"Nah, don't bother. Knock 'em out. We gotta get you boys to the Shatterdome," Hannibal said. "World's gone to shit."

"Funny, that's what that guy said," Newt said, nodding towards the man Kaelyn had in a sleeper hold. "But he doesn't look like he wants to answer any questions."

"I take it you just decided to rescue us on your own then?" Hermann asked as he pulled off his blindfold.

Newt got to his feet and then helped Hermann up as well, beaming all the while at Hannibal.

"So you _are_ willing to risk an international incident to save me. I'm flattered," Newt said.

Hannibal's expression remained unreadable. "Get in the god damn car."

 

-.-

 

"Sir, we've got Newt and Hermann coming in," Tendo said, voice loud through the small headset Herc had in his ear. "Looks like their American escort was ambushed by Hannibal's gang, but they'll be here in twenty minutes."

"Good, where's the Kaiju?" Herc jogged down the corridor, Mako at his side as he went.

"Still just hovering around the Breach sir," Tendo said.

"We should use this time wisely," Mako said. "But...Marshal, I don't think this is going to work."

"Yeah, well it's not exactly like we have much of a choice," Herc said as they entered the prep room.

He shrugged out of his jacket and began to strip as the techs swarmed them with bits and pieces of their old suits. Herc's was still the original from Striker Eureka and he tried not to look too hard at the stamped kills along the breastplate for fear of psyching himself out and ruining what was already a small chance of being able to Drift.

The doors to the prep room opened and Raleigh stepped through, tugging off his sweater as he did so. Herc wanted to say something, anything to make Raleigh understand he wouldn't have asked him to come if he had another choice, but the words dried up in his throat before he could even try to say them. Raleigh gave Herc a quick nod and then held out his arms to the techs could start covering him with Gipsy's old armor, but not before Herc got a look at the matching set of scars Raleigh had crawling up one arm, across his chest and down the other. With both sides scarred, Herc could understand the reluctance to get back in the game. Add in the emotional scars and Herc still couldn't quite believe he was there.

"You guys really think this is gonna work?" Raleigh asked.

"No," Mako said as the fluid drained from her helmet. "But we're the only ones here."

They filed into the comm-pod, Raleigh heading for the middle to be the link to hold Mako and Herc together. With both sides damaged, it made sense to keep the pain equally balanced. Herc locked himself into the harness, the familiarity of the motions helping steady him some even as his heart raced faster, the fear of entering the Drift without Chuck pumping through him.

"Initiating drop in thirty seconds guys," Tendo's voice said through the helmet.

Herc kept his gaze forward as the Jaeger's robotic voice began the countdown. After so many drops and years of training, he had long ago learned the difference between good anxiety and bad; what could keep him on his toes and what would get him killed. For the first time in years, he knew he was feeling the latter. Before he could think it over too hard, the comm-pod dropped. It locked into place and the voice informed them of the Drift being initiated in twenty seconds.

He tried to slow his breathing or calm his heart, but then he was thrust into the cool blue light of the Drift. His mind reared back as Mako and Raleigh's minds twisted together in a jumble of thoughts and memories, blending together even as they reached out to him. Herc knew what to do, rationally. He knew how to accept the presence of his Drift partners without bringing anything troubling into the Drift himself.

And yet this time, despite his training and experience, he couldn't stop himself from pulling inward like a wounded animal, scrambling to hide the injuries and protect itself.

"Herc, you're out of alignment. Bring it back," Tendo ordered, but his voice sounded far away.

Herc grit his teeth and clenched his jaw tight. He couldn't remember the last time he'd felt so out of control. He was used to being able to compartmentalize without letting anything build up in a toxic way, and yet the pain, so stark and apparent in the Drift, was something he hadn't been aware of. Some deep part of him wouldn't let him share the pain he didn't yet understand himself with the others that wanted to be in his mind.

"This isn't going to work, Tendo. Power it down," Raleigh said.

Herc sucked in a tight breath as the Drift disengaged, all of his limbs weak and trembling so that when his harness released him he barely caught himself. Raleigh and Mako helped him to his feet, supporting him on either side as the comm-pod slowly rose back up to the level of the prep room. He felt like a goddamn recruit on his first drop simulation.

That thought alone sent a surge of anger shooting through him and Herc lurched away from Raleigh and Mako's support. He leaned hard against the wall as he walked back into the prep room. The techs swarmed them again but Herc held up a hand before they could start dismantling the suits.

"We need to try again," Herc said.

"Absolutely not," Raleigh said. "Just order a god damn nuclear strike."

"The amount of nukes we'd have to let off to kill this thing would create too much fallout," Herc said. "We need-"

"We got Newt and Hermann here," Tendo interrupted through the communicators and the helmets. "I suggest pulling back and strategizing now that we've got them."

Herc stared across the room at Raleigh. The other's gaze was stubborn and he knew if he insisted they try again first, Raleigh would push back. After all, Herc never had the authority Stacker had to begin with and it was worse now when he was second-guessing himself.

"Alright. We'll be in the control room in fifteen," Herc said.

The techs set to work stripping them of their suits and handing them their clothes. The shame and embarrassment of the failed Drift sat like a cold stone in Herc's gut as they headed back up. Halfway there, Raleigh reached out and grabbed Herc's wrist, forcing him to a halt.

"Mako, give us a minute," Raleigh said.

Mako gave Herc a pointed look before giving a short nod in Raleigh's direction. "I'll go ahead."

Herc tugged himself out of Raleigh's grip. "This is not the time, ranger."

"No? You asked me to come, and I did, but you have _got_ to pull yourself together if you want us to listen you. If you want the rest of the world to listen to you," Raleigh said. "Now, I don't know what the fuck was up with you in the Drift. We should probably figure it out before we try that again, but for now, the people in that control room need you to be calm and _lead_. I'm not a leader and neither is Mako. That falls on you. You can freak out later."

Herc wondered when the hell Raleigh had turned into him and he had turned into Chuck. The anger boiling in his chest felt so much like what he'd felt from Chuck when they Drifted and for a moment, he really understood what it was like to be talked down to by someone he didn't consider a superior. Of course he knew what _Chuck_ had felt, but it was the first time in years he felt the emotion all on his own.

"Jesus Christ, if you want to punch me for saying that, go ahead, just stop glaring at me," Raleigh said, the tension in his shoulders draining.

"No, no, you're right," Herc said. "I...am not as stable as Stacker was."

"I don't think anyone could be, but I'm not asking you to be him. I'm asking you to lead us in whatever way you think is best. Just don't let your pride get in the way, yeah?"

"I'll need you to help. I don't actually know what I'm doing," Herc said with a heavy sigh.

"Pretend you do then. Pretty sure that's what Stacker was doing 90% of the time anyways," Raleigh said.

"Right." Herc started to turn and then paused to look at Raleigh. "Thank you. After that absolute...shite, I think I needed to hear that."

Raleigh slung an arm over Herc's shoulder. "Not a problem."  
           

-.-

 

Newt leaned heavily on Hannibal, keeping his eyes shut tight to block out the light. He and Hermann had made it to the elevator before collapsing, but with the help of Hannibal and Kaelyn, he and Herman made it to the control room in one piece. He sat down at one of the empty control chairs Hannibal guided him to, and then he slumped into Hannibal's warm side.

"Have you been seeing anything?" Tendo asked.

Tendo sounded like he was level with Newt, which meant he had to be kneeling.

"Just pain. Also, lights are starting to hurt," Newt said.

"When did it start?" Tendo asked.

"We were locked in a dark room. We lost track of time," Hermann said from somewhere just passed where Tendo was.

"Does it have something to do with the Kaiju coming through the Breach?" Tendo asked.

"Most likely, which means we can take our continued pain as an assumption that we will be experiencing a double event," Hermann said.

The control room door opened again and Newt risked opening his eyes enough to see Herc and Raleigh move inside, but another burst of pain convinced him to close his eyes once more.

"If we turn off the lights could you open your eyes?" Mako asked.

"Possibly," Newt said.

"It'd certainly help," Hermann added.

Hannibal squeezed the back of Newt's neck to let him know it was okay to open his eyes. When he did so, the room was dark minus the soft glow of a few scattered computer monitors and the ache in his eyes was greatly reduced because of it. Tendo straightened and backed away to allow Herc to step closer.

The new Marshal looked how Newt felt; rundown, worn out, and in a lot of freaking pain. It was weird seeing so much expression on the face of a man Newt was used to seeing as a stoic figure. Before he could say something potentially offensive about it though, a fresh wave of pain exploded in his head and started to crawl its way down Newt's spine.

"Shit!" Raleigh said, darting forward to stop Hermann from falling out of his chair.

Newt nearly fell out of his too, but Hannibal managed to catch him and hold him up. Otachi's roar clamored through his head all at once and after so many hours without her presence and despite the pain washing through him, it was almost a relief to have her there once more.

"Newt! What is it? What are you hearing?" Hannibal demanded.

Newt clung to Hannibal's suit jacket, forcing himself to focus on the other man's voice, the deep tenor that was so drastically different from Otachi's piercing wail. Hers was a panicked sound now, something he wasn't used to. After spending so much time only hearing her screech possessively and angrily about him, feeling something else reverberating through his mind and down his spine was terrifying, because it meant that it wasn't a hallucination, it wasn't just a Ghost Drift, they were Drifting and she-

"She's here, she has to be, check the fucking charts!" Newt's voice cracked and he swiped at the blood that had begun gushing from his nose.

He was dimly aware of the clamor of sounds and Tendo shouting orders at people, but then his vision spun and he let Otachi's scream pull him under.

 

-.-

 

"Sir, it's definitely a double event," Tendo said.

Herc stared at the screen which showed two bright yellow dots circling the symbol that represented the Breach. "We need visual now. Do we have choppers out there? Have they even breached the surface?"

"Someone want to explain to me why they collapsed?" Raleigh demanded. "It sounds like they were fucking Ghost Drifting with a Kaiju."

"That's because they were." Hannibal's voice cut through the noise and confusion and when Herc turned back around, the larger man was cradling Newt's limp and now blood covered form easily in his arms. "He's been Ghost Drifting with the bitch for months. The goddamn flying one. Thought it was hallucinations at first but we'd begun to suspect something else."

"Jesus Christ," Raleigh said. "What the hell are we supposed to do?"

The control room doors opened again and Herc shifted to see Cheung wheel himself into the room. His legs were covered by a red blanket, the golden symbol of Crimson Typhoon emblazoned on the part that covered his lap. His face was scarred, marks of the Jaeger suit crawling up his neck and stretching out over both sides of his face, angry red lines that perfectly matched the circuitry of the rest of the suit.

"Sorry for my delay," Cheung said, his English a bit halting. "I suggest the three of you learn how to Drift together or Hong Kong will be destroyed."

"Yeah, well why don't you go ahead and provide us with the valuable insight that will let us do that," Herc said, the frustration of the last few hours finally coming out as he snapped at the former pilot.

Raleigh reached out and put a hand on Herc's arm. "Man, come on, don't talk to him like that."

"I am not fragile and never have been. I do not need your protection, Becket," Cheung said, wheeling closer. "I apologize for my delay, as I said. I would have explained if I had time. A three way Drift requires complete trust between all three members. That is why my brothers and I were able to do it. You will have to attain the same sort of bond with Mr. Becket and Miss Mori if you want a shot at Crimson Typhoon working for you."

"Yeah, I'm not willing to bet my life on the three of you getting along," Hannibal said.

"I agree with the mob boss," Cheung said, the barest hint of a smirk twisting his lips. "Is there another Jaeger that's been restored?"

"Cherno Alpha might be," Herc said. "Or at least, I'm assuming it did if the Kaidonovskys survived."

"There's no way they'd transport it here in time," Tendo said. "Guys, we need a solution and we need it now."

"Get visual on the Kaiju," Hannibal said. "I'd be willing to bet they're just fighting each other."

"Why the hell would they do that?" Raleigh asked.

Hannibal nodded at the monitor, and indeed the two yellow dots were ramming into one another. "That's a good sign. Plus, if Otachi did come through, she's a bit possessive of Newt. My guess is she'll try and eliminate any threats between her and him."

"I don't even want to know, but I know eventually I'm going to have to ask. For now, I need visual on the Kaiju. I need President Yongzheng here as well. We may need to mobilize his army," Herc said.

"I will go retrieve President Yongzheng," Mako said.

"So if these Kaiju really are fighting, do we just let them finish each other off or what?" Raleigh asked. "What if Otachi dies instead of the new one?"

"Then hopefully by then you'll have a better plan than hoping you three can all hold hands and exchange your deep dark secrets with each other," Hannibal said, voice sharp.

"And if Otachi survives?" Herc asked.

"Then I suggest we give her what she wants," Hannibal said. He turned and deposited Newt in his female lackey's arms before moving over and hauling Hermann off the ground where Raleigh had eased him down earlier. He picked Hermann up and grabbed his cane.

"You're suggesting we just...sacrifice Newt to her," Tendo said.

"Not sacrifice," Hannibal said. "Whatever happened when he Drifted with the Kaiju hive mind, it somehow connected him to her. As far as I've been able to tell, she doesn't want him dead."

"This is all theoretical bullshit. Once we have visual, we'll worry about an actual plan," Herc said. "Mako."

"Right." Mako ducked her head and then hurried out of the room to retrieve the Chinese president.

"Alright, let's get those two laid out," Raleigh said, gesturing to Hannibal and his companion.

They headed to the back of the room where there was a line of benches to lay out the two scientists. Herc stepped up to Cheung, holding out his hand for the other to shake.

"I apologize for my behavior. Rough day," Herc said.

"It is okay. I understand," Cheung said, accepting Herc's grasp. "Crimson is finicky about her pilots. She will accept nothing but absolute trust. Looking at the charts, I do not think you are the man for this Jaeger."

Herc turned, following Cheung's gaze to the screens behind him. Tendo was tapping away at something else, which left his view of the read out of the failed Drift unobstructed. Raleigh and Mako were synchronized at 100%. He hadn't even managed 1% with either of them.

"I'm sorry," Herc said with a heavy sigh as he looked back at Cheung.

"I do not mind. I will do what I can to help you save the world, but that does not mean the world has anything left to offer me. Please keep that in mind," Cheung said. His gaze was hard and it was the stonewalled expression and empty tone of voice that made Herc's breath catch for a moment because it was all too familiar.

"Thank you for being here. I know it's hard," Herc said.

Cheung nodded and then wheeled himself over to where Tendo was. Herc wanted to sit down and work through all the thoughts racing through his head, the anger and disappoint and fear and panic. He still couldn't quite believe Stacker had done this for years when he couldn't handle a day.

"Sir, we have visual!" one of the techs shouted.

Herc whirled to face the screen and Raleigh and Hannibal moved to stand on either side of him. The sun was above the horizon but the sky was still cast in a red-orange over the ocean, and it would have been pretty if it weren't for the two Kaiju gushing blue toxic blood into the ocean.

The first, the largest, was similar to the Leatherback that had decimated Cherno Alpha, slow and lumbering. Out of its back, a host of bright yellow tentacles sprouted out, lashing out and carving deep slashes into Otachi's dark grey hide. Despite what Hannibal had said, Herc hadn't really believed he'd see Otachi again, let alone two Kaiju actually fighting.

"My God..." Herc whispered.

"It doesn't look like she's winning," Hannibal said. "If you want my opinion-"

"Frankly, I don't," Herc said.

Before Hannibal could respond, the control room doors opened and Yongzheng strode through with Mako at his heels.

"Mr. Choi, my General should be requesting a communication link up," Yongzheng said.

"Accepting it now," Tendo said. "And we are live."

Yongzheng nodded at Herc. "My army is in your hands, Marshal Hansen. Do not forget their sacrifice."

Herc turned and headed for the main desk, Raleigh at his side. "All units converge on the Leatherback. I'm going to be sending out a boat once it's down. Protect the boat but _do not engage_ with Otachi until otherwise ordered. Just do whatever you can to help Otachi take out the Leatherback and we'll work out what to do next from there."

"Understood, sir."

"Hannibal get Newt awake. He's going out in that boat," Herc said. "If we can take the Leatherback down and Newt can neutralize Otachi, we'll be able to avert more casualties."

"Sounds good to me," Hannibal said with a shrug.

"Wait, that just...sounds good to you?" Raleigh asked, his voice harsh. "Isn't he your...significant other?"

Any other time and Herc would appreciate Raleigh's sense of honor and overall good American boy attitude, but now, he was tired, and irritated, and scared, and really just wanted to do whatever he could to make sure more people didn't die.

"I'm going to say this once," Hannibal said, his huge form crowding Raleigh's space. "Don't you ever doubt the amount of care I have for my _significant other_ again. I know more about what's been going on in his head with this goddamn Kaiju than any of you so I have every reason to believe that this is the best course of action. So how about you be a good little soldier and listen to your goddamn superiors?"

Raleigh's face looked pinched and his fists were clenched, but before he could move, Hannibal turned away. No matter how angry Raleigh was, Herc knew that the other ranger was a man who played fair. He'd never hit anyone when their back was turned. Herc counted it as a blessing.

 

-.-

 

Newt woke with a shout, nearly smacking into Kaelyn as he did so. She moved the smelling salts back and placed a hand on his chest to ease him back down on the bench before moving out of the way and letting Hannibal crouch down next to him. His head was pounding something fierce and Otachi's voice was louder than ever in his ears, making his vision swim and blur.

Hannibal's hands reached out and cupped his face, the warm touch jolting him back into his body, a Pavlovian response to how many times Hannibal had driven her voice out of his mind over and over again. Newt sucked in a heaving breath and listened to Hannibal's voice, the jumbled sounds slowly transforming into words. Equations. Simple, basic addition and subtraction problems, then algebra, then calculus, some physics, growing harder and harder as Newt began to answer, brain racing to find the answers and forcing him to turn the answers into actual words. His tongue twisted around the basic shapes, finally clicking into something coherent and then-

"Jesus Christ is he okay?"

Raleigh's voice, somewhere behind Hannibal, jarred Newt and he winced, reaching out to curl his fists in Hannibal's suit jacket.

"I'm fine," Newt said, the words a bit slurred but at least they were coming out mostly right. "Brain's fuzzy. Hard sharing with a big monster...Hermann okay?"

"Given the state of you it's probably best we keep him unconscious," Hannibal said. "We're taking you out into the harbor on a boat. Otachi came through the Breach but she's fighting another Kaiju. We think she's...coming after you."

"To protect me," Newt said, never so sure of it as he was now. Otachi's angry roar settled into a low hum of contentment at the words and his thoughts, which, okay that was a little creepy. "Alright, let's do it. Help me up?"

Hannibal picked him up easily, tossing him over his broad shoulder. There were two soldiers standing by the door and Newt glanced around, realizing Yongzheng had arrived as well. He decided not to say anything to the president given his current state.

"I've got this, Marshal Hansen," Newt said, giving the Marshal a thumbs up as he was carried out of the room.

Herc didn't look as confident as Newt but Newt didn't care. Perhaps if Otachi wasn't so loud in his head, her contentment erased by the anger and pain of whatever fight she was in the middle of, he would care a bit more, but all he wanted was to help the monster in his mind. That itself was new. He spent so much time fighting her but for some reason, it all clicked in his brain. She needed him, and he was more than happy to hand himself over _because he was hers so_ -

"You're mine," Hannibal said, voice gruff and low.

"I'm talking out loud aren't I?" Newt asked. "Sorry. You know you got me. No need to be jealous."

Hannibal grunted a response and another thought drifted through Newt's head. He squirmed in Hannibal's grip until he had contorted himself enough to look Hannibal in the eyes.

"You're afraid for me aren't you?" Newt asked.

Hannibal's gaze was unreadable behind his sunglasses but Newt could tell he was right from the way Hannibal's jaw seemed to clench a little tighter.

"I'm simultaneously pleased and also terrified by that knowledge," Newt said before settling into Hannibal's grip.

Another soldier joined them and shoved a small earpiece into Newt's hand, gesturing for him to put it in. Newt's fingers weren't cooperating quite yet so it took a few tries before he got it in.

"Uh, yo, this is Newt," he said.

"Right, after talking with Yongzheng, we've decided to send you out in one of their military boats. It'll be equipped with two nuclear missiles in case your interactions with Otachi go south. Hopefully it'll be enough of a distraction to get you back out of there," Herc said through his earpiece. "We've also demanded that Milkovich sends down Cherno from wherever it is he's been hiding her. The fight between Otachi and Leatherback might buy us enough time for her to arrive so you might have some form of back up besides just the two nukes."

"Okay, works for me," Newt said, even though it definitely didn't because that was a lot ifs and maybes. "Should I keep this thing in?"

"Yes. We will have visual on you but it's better if you can tell us what exactly she's doing once she reaches you as well," Herc said. "Your safety comes first, Dr. Geiszler. If she becomes hostile, we will fire on her."

"Yeah, I'm not going to object to that," Newt said.

"Good luck, Dr. Geiszler."

Newt slumped against Hannibal and tried to ignore Otachi's growling.

 

-.-

 

Newt clung to the railing of the boat, the water spray cold enough to make him shiver but he didn't step away because if he was focused on how freaking _cold_ he was, he didn't have to think about what he was doing. They were ten miles out from the Hong Kong harbor, which left fifteen miles between them and the showdown between the two Kaiju.

The large military boat began to slow and Newt looked towards the direction the roars of the monsters came from. Otachi and Leatherback seemed small at this distance, the sounds of the fighting and the explosions muffled by how far away they were.

"Leatherback is about to go down, Dr. Geiszler. Are you ready?" Herc asked.

"Uh, yeah. Sure."

The boat began to slow and Newt turned to face the deck. Yongzheng had sent a squad of men to support him on deck, though honestly he didn't feel much safer backed by a group of men holding grenade launchers. Actually, the more he thought about it, the more he realized how stupid they all were. He had some weird, half understood bond with a _monster._ They were depending on _that_ to keep them safe. It wasn't like anyone legitimately thought a few nukes underwater and some grenade launchers were actually going to do anything to Otachi, and who knew how many men had gone down just trying to help take out Leatherback.

"Jesus, I'm going to get everyone killed," Newt mumbled as he turned back to the ocean.

"You will with that sort of thinking," Herc said. "Leatherback is down and it looks like Otachi is diving underwater to head for you."

Newt swallowed thickly and then stepped back up to the edge of the railing. Otachi's growls were a steady noise in his head, rhythmic, and he could feel the deep-set possession she felt for him, could feel it like tendrils branching out from his brain to spread down his limbs and overwhelm him and-

One of the men behind him shouted and Newt rocked back into awareness, eyes flying open wide as the water in front of him began to bubble up. The boat rocked and his knuckles turned white as he clenched as tight as he could to the railing. The water crested and splashed over the edges of the boat, dousing Newt in the freezing cold water.

Otachi's scream echoed in his ears and in his head and he fell to his knees as his vision began to spin, one arm wrapping tight around a slippery pole as he slid across the scant piece of deck. His arms trembled, weak from the pain that had begun to wash through him once more but he pulled himself tighter up to the pole, his feet kicking at the side of the slippery boat, searching for any sort of traction.

"Newt, do we fire?"

Newt gasped out a quick 'no' before he lost his grip and went plunging down into the water. It closed over his head and he tried to swim up but the connection between his brain and his limbs refused to work. Strong tentacles, glowing a fluorescent blue he'd seen countless times in his dreams, wrapped around his middle, tugging him up out of the water in one smooth motion.

He sucked in a harsh breath, eyes struggling to focus as best they could without his glasses. He didn't really need them to know what was happening anyways. The tentacles wrapped around his middle were from Otachi's mouth, the feelers she had used to try and locate him back when he'd been in one of the underground shelters of Hong Kong.

They were surprisingly gentle and he could hear her humming at the back of his mind. Or maybe that was what he was actually hearing. It was all too hard to separate out, having her so close, so-

The tentacles shifted, bringing him around so that he was hovering before one, giant yellow eye.

"Shit," Newt said, voice cracking.

He'd been close to her before, but this...this was new. Even without his glasses, he could pick out every individual grey scale, interrupted by the occasional flow of thick blue blood from some unseen cut on one of her odd horns at the end of her snout.

"So...are you not killing me?"

_Mine._

The word echoed around in his head, but it was weird because it wasn't a word so much as a feeling that manifested into a sound in his mind. He reached out a trembling hand and placed it on the grey scales beside her eye.

"Yeah, I'm yours baby," he whispered. "You got me. You can keep me safe. But we're Drifting with the whole hive mind, aren't we? And we can't have that. They'll know what we're doing."

Otachi let out a distorted, mournful noise, the bulbous flap of skin that held her toxin under her chin expanding and contracting as she did so. Her big yellow eye closed and Newt had the sudden sensation that she was _thinking_ , processing what he said and what it meant and then the tentacles were moving him away from her and back towards the boat. She let him down gently onto the deck and immediately a group of soldiers surrounded him.

His legs gave out but he managed to catch himself on his hands before he face planted onto the metal.

"Newt! What's happening? Should they fire?" Herc demanded in his ear.

Newt looked up at Otachi. She was massive, easily dwarfing the boat. Blood gushed out of various wounds and odd lines glowed along her spine, pulsing with a rhythm he could feel at the back of his head, and with a sudden start, he realized the rhythm was actually his pulse. Her tail rose up out of the water and into the air, its claw-like structure stretching wide and then-

A scream tore its way out of Newt's throat as pain, worse than anything he'd ever felt before, pain he hoped to god he'd never feel again, exploded in his head. He collapsed, dimly aware that he was shaking, was seizing, but unable to stop it. Otachi's pained cry sounded alongside his, but whether it was out loud or in his head he couldn't tell, and he tried to reach out to her with his mind, tell her it was okay, they were going to be okay, that whatever she was doing she could stop because it wasn't worth this, it wasn't-


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> See, contrary to popular belief, I am still writing this story, I swear. I do intend to finish it by June at the latest so. There's that at least.

[The tumblr](http://schizzar.tumblr.com)

When Newt came to, it was on a cold cement ground, a stark contrast to the large mass radiating heat behind him. He was definitely in the Shatterdome. He'd spent too much time within its walls not to recognize the drab color, with or without his glasses. He pushed himself upright and then twisted around to see what he was leaning against.

It wasn't like he was surprised to see Otachi. It made sense. That didn't mean it didn't take his breath away to see her this close without being in danger. At least he assumed he wasn't. The slow expansion of her large chest cavity implied she was sleeping, and sleeping monsters were always safer in Newt's book. Still didn't mean he was comfortable waking up near blind next to her. He shuffled closer after getting to his feet, then placed a hand, grey hide.

The resulting noise Otachi made was something like a low purr that shook its way up Newt's arm.

"Dr. Geiszler, the bay doors are about to open. Please place yourself between Otachi and the doors," ordered Herc's voice through the speakers that lined the walls.

"Right, got it," Newt said.

He didn't take his hand off of the beast as he moved up towards her neck and the weird rumbling noise continued. By the time he reached her head, which was resting on top of her folded forelegs, her eyes were closed. Newt let out a careful breath and stroked her snout, being careful of the large horns. The sound of the doors opening made him turn. He couldn't see who was walking through the door, but a sudden wave of protective _need_ washed through him and he turned back towards Otachi, unsure if the emotions were hers or his own.

"Easy, it's fine, we're safe," he said, resuming the slow strokes of his hand.

"Newton," Hermann said, tapping his shoulder.

Newt turned the rest of the way around and Hermann handed over a pair of his spare glasses. "Where'd you get these?"

Hermann glanced at Otachi. "Your mobster friend. Otachi isn't overly fond of his presence."

Hermann shifted to the side to let Herc and Mako approach. As he moved, Newt realized the other scientist was shaking, so Newt moved after him, grabbing his shoulder and tugging him back towards Otachi.

"You can lean on her. It's fine. She likes us, I think," Newt said.

Hermann's lips twitched, but his grip on his cane loosened and he let himself lean against the side of her mouth. Newt shifted to look at Herc and Mako.

"So...what's happening?"

"We're still deciding," Herc said. "The G8 council has relocated further inland while we figure out this whole...thing. We tried to take you to the med bay but she started to grow violent so we just put you two in here until you woke up."

"Right. Okay..." Newt shrugged.

"What exactly happened?" Mako asked.

"Uh...I told her that we couldn't be attached to the hive mind and that's when she did that...thing," Newt said.

"I collapsed again," Hermann said. "I came to long enough to pass back out. It felt like she was severing the link."

"But she didn't. Not completely anyways," Newt said, glancing between Herc and Mako. "I can still feel her in my head but it's not as...loud."

"I suggest we hook the two of you up to one of the Drift monitors," Mako said. "That will help us see what's happening in your minds."

Herc nodded. "Makes sense to me."

"So we're not going to hurt her?" Newt asked, unable to help the note of relief in his voice.

"Despite the hysterical phone calls I keep getting...no," Herc said. "Not unless she becomes a threat. As it stands, she's one of our only weapons, at least until the other pilots can be retrained."

"Okay. I think she finds that reasonable," Newt said. Otachi's eyes had slid shut again, which he took to mean she felt safe, but he also couldn't guarantee she'd actually understood what was being said.

"I guess we'll find out," Herc said. "Mako still arrange the Drift monitors to be brought here. Dr. Gottlieb, can you come with us?"

Hermann straightened, already looking better. "Yes of course."

"I take it I should stay?" Newt asked.

A low growl made the floor beneath them vibrate.

"I am going to assume that's a yes," Herc said. "We'll be in touch."

Hermann reached into his pocket and handed Newt his phone. "Call Hannibal, if she'll let you. He won't say it but he's...worried." Hermann's expression grew pinched, as if the very idea of Hannibal and emotions going together was impossible.

"Thanks man," Newt said.

He watched the three of them leave, then sat down on the floor between two of Otachi's claws. He tried not to think too hard about how scared he felt.

 

-.-

 

"Marshall, Dr. Gottlieb and I can handle Dr. Geiszler and Otachi," Mako said as they entered the elevator. "You should speak with Cheung and Raleigh to start developing other strategies."

Herc looked over at her and nodded. "Thank you, Mako."

She smiled. "Of course, Marshall. May I also suggest you hire assistant?"

"Noted," Herc said dryly.

He got off the elevator first and headed for the communication room for Crimson Typhoon. Only Cheung was there, flipping through the manila folder containing the stats on the red Jaeger.

"Do you miss your son, Marshall?" Cheung asked, setting the folder and spinning his wheelchair to face Herc head on.

"Yes," Herc said, stopping two rows of computers back from Cheung as apprehension filled him. "Every day."

"But you have not given up yet," Cheung said. "Why?"

"I don't know," Herc said, because really, he _didn't_ , but that had always been a part of his mind he didn't dare look at too hard.

"Once you answer that question, then perhaps you'll be able to Drift again," Cheung said.

"Thank you, I suppose," Herc said with a frown.

"Sorry. I understand that my advice might not be wanted," Cheung said. "But you cannot be Nothing-Drifter anymore. Mako and Raleigh seem to give everything, and that is what you need to do too, but you can't if you don't know your own mind."

Herc swallowed thickly and sat down on the edge of one of the desks. "So did you never hold anything back with your brothers?"

"No. We grew up too dependent on each other," Cheung said. "Whatever it is you are hiding from yourself will destroy you in the Drift."

"Well, you're not wrong, and I do appreciate the advice," Herc said. "But I'm more concerned with our incoming pilots and how to deal with these Kaiju. I was hoping you'd be willing to help."

"If you want to consult my opinion, I do not mind. I have no interest in dealing with the political things," Cheung said.

"I appreciate it," Herc said. "Do you happen to know where Raleigh is?"

"Last I heard, he was heading for his old room," Cheung said.

"Thanks," Herc said. "I...when we get a chance, I'd like to speak with you more."

Cheung dipped his head in agreement and Herc headed out of the room. Mako was certainly right. He needed an assistant, and they definitely needed the infrastructure of the Shatterdome up and running if they were going to get anything done. He pulled out his phone and called Raleigh up, figuring it'd be quicker than trying to find him on his own.

"Yeah?" Raleigh asked.

"Meet me in the top floor meeting room," Herc said. "We need to talk strategy."

"Got it."

No sooner had he hung up, his phone rang again, but it was Tendo so he answered.

"What is it?" he asked.

"ETA for Kennedy LaRue and Stephanie Lanphier is ten minutes. Where do you want me to send them?" Tendo asked.

"Top floor meeting room. Do we have an ETA for the Jaegers?"

"Six hours for Romeo Blue and Hydra Corinthian. Two hours for Cherno Alpha and her pilots," Tendo said.

"What about their tech teams?"

"Can't say for sure. From what the ambassadors are telling me, a lot of people aren't willing to come back," Tendo said. "It's going to take sometime to get things running smoothly."

"I don't think we're going to have that time," Herc said. "I think we have a better chance taming Otachi."

"Stop freaking out so much. Crimson's team is all here and they can handle the extra work in the short run," Tendo said. "Besides, if you lose it, so will everyone else."

"Thank you Tendo, always a help," Herc said dryly.

"Yes sir, Marshall."

Herc hung up and opened the door to the meeting room that looked over the bay. Raleigh had managed to beat him there and was standing by the window on the other side of the large round table with his arms folded across his chest.

"So do you have a plan?" Raleigh asked, not turning to look at him.

"No. I'm not Stacker. I'm not prepared for every possibility," Herc said.

"Hey, even he was grasping at straws when he came up with Pitfall."

"Not exactly a comforting thought," Herc said.

Raleigh shrugged and turned to look at him. "I've never been good with this sorta thing, man, so let's just talk strategy. I've run point with Cherno and Hydra before. That was with Gipsy, but I still think we'd be an effective team for any Category 4 or 5. If we got time, we should run some actual drills, not just simulations."

"We'll have you and Mako in Romeo Blue," Herc said. "I take it you think working Crimson Typhoon is impossible."

"For now, yes."

The words stung, but Herc couldn't help but appreciate Raleigh blunt honesty.

"Look, it's a bad idea to have our Marshall out there in the first place. Stacker told me he was supposed to be a fixed point," Raleigh said. "You should be the same but if you want to be out there...you have got to start trusting people again."

"I think Cheung would agree with you," Herc said.

Before Raleigh could say anything in response, the meeting room doors opened and Kennedy and Stephanie strode through. If any pair of pilots were an example of pilots who weren't able to stop drifting outside the Jaeger, it was the Hydra Corinthian team. They took the same measured steps and everything from their shoulders to their hips swayed the same way, but they couldn't look more different.

Kennedy was the taller of the two, almost Herc's height, with long, curly red hair tugged back in a high ponytail which made her high cheekbones seem even sharper. Her gaze, caught between grey and blue, was much angrier than Stephanie's calm green look. Stephanie came up to Kennedy's shoulder, her brown hair in a short pixie cut that followed the line of her jaw. Freckles were splattered across her cheeks and the bridge of her nose. Stephanie placed a hand on Kennedy's shoulder just barely managing to stop her from storming up nose-to-nose with Herc.

"Alright. We're here. I fucking told you guys I was done but I'm here anyways so I want a god damn thank you," Kennedy said, the fury in her voice thick.

"Thank you," Herc said. "I'm sorry that I even had to ask."

Kennedy deflated almost immediately. "Good. Becket, nice to see you."

Raleigh gave a slow and easy grin Herc wished he could copy. "Nice to see you too LaRue, Lanphier."

Stephanie let go of Kennedy and smiled back. "So, are we talking strategy then? We've been briefed on the Kaiju you're keeping in the basement so we can skip that whole bit."

"Which, just for the record, I think is the stupidest fucking idea ever," Kennedy said. "But I'm not a scientist, so..."

"Mako and I will be running Romeo Blue," Raleigh said. "And we've got Cherno Alpha's team confirmed as well. Assuming we've only got one Kaiju coming through at a time, we can probably stick to the usual three way drop drills."

"And if more than one comes through? Everyone's seen the footage of the first double event," Stephanie said.

"We're not sure," Herc said. "We potentially have a Kaiju on our side which is more of a help than a hurt so far. We would've lost a lot of lives if it weren't for Otachi. We can't depend on that of course, but there's a lot of things up in the air right now."

"This is just a shit show, isn't it?" Kennedy asked, folding her arms across her chest. "You don't know what the hell you're doing."

The words, true as they were felt like a punch to the chest. "I-"

"We're going to get fucking killed at this rate. Why don't we put Becket in charge?" Kennedy asked.

"Hey, slow down," Raleigh said, pushing his way between Kennedy and Herc. "Herc didn't have to come back. None of us did. If you think Herc is going to get you killed, then _leave_. No one's going to stop you. The rest of us will pick up your slack because we're the only ones standing between those monsters and the rest of the world."

For a brief moment, Herc thought Kennedy was going to deck Raleigh in the face, but then she took a step back and Herc let out his held breath.

"I appreciate the sentiment, Becket, but you're just proving my fucking point," Kennedy said.

"I think maybe we need to cool off," Stephanie said. "Could we reconvene in two hours? I'd like to unpack my bags."

"Yes, of course," Herc said. "Did Tendo give you my number?"

Stephanie and Kennedy nodded at the same time. Before Kennedy could say anything else, Stephanie tugged her out of the room. As soon as the door shut, Herc's shoulders slumped and he leaned over one of the chairs, bowing his head. He knew Kennedy was right, and that was the problem.

"Look Herc-"

Herc held up a hand to cut him off. "Don't, Becket. I don't need you to baby me. I don't need to be led along by the hand, and I don't need your empty, comforting words."

He regretted the words almost as soon as they were out of his mouth and he regretted it even more when he heard Raleigh's sharp in take of breath. He felt like he was grasping at straws, still trying to be the father when there was no one to be a father of. And that thought was like _another_ punch to the chest.

"Okay. Fine. I won't push," Raleigh said. "But you've gotta lean on someone eventually, Herc."

Herc didn't respond, only relaxing once he heard Raleigh leave.

 

-.-

 

"Okay, so can we go over this again?" Newt asked, voice shaking a bit as he sealed another sensor onto Otachi's head.

One of the Drift monitors had been dragged into the room, only instead of two head sensors, there were old school electrodes to hook up his mind to Otachi's. Speaking of-

Newt's arm shot out, curling around one of her spikes as she raised her head long enough to yawn before settling back down. He stared, wide-eyed, down at Hermann. His hands shook as he went back to sticking sensors on Otachi's head.

"Okay, seriously Hermann, start talking," Newt said. "Distract me for the love of-"

"Right, of course, we're just going to track how the Ghost Drift between you is functioning," Hermann said, and _Jesus_ , his voice shook more than Newt's did. "Then we'll compare it with the data about the brain waves between Otachi and Leatherback that Cherno Alpha, Crimson Typhoon, and Gipsy Danger picked up from the double event to see what the differences are. Theoretically, we'll be able to tell if she's still hooked up with the Kaiju hive mind. If she isn't we'll be able to start looking into how we can use you two to fight back."

"Oh, we could pilot a Jaeger together," Newt said, sealing the last censor on her hide.

"Newton, don't be ridiculous. That is an utter waste of resources and-"

"But it would look cool," Newt said as he crawled up to Otachi's bony shoulder. "Don't lie, you know we'd look badass."

"Yes, because _that_ is our main concern right now," Hermann said. "The world is ending but at least we _look_ cool."

"See, now you're getting it." Newt took a deep breath and closed his eyes.

"That was _sarcasm_ , Newton, I'm sure you're familiar with-"

Newt yelped as he pushed himself off and slid down Otachi's arm and landed hard on the concrete. When he opened his eyes, Hermann was standing above him, glasses sliding down his nose and his lips pursed.

"Thanks, dude," Newt said quietly as he pushed himself upright. "Let's get this show on the road."

"I _do_ wish we had a full K-Science team here," Hermann said.

"Yeah well no one wants to be near our baby so-"

"She's not our baby."

"She's kind of our baby-"

"I'm turning the machine on now," Hermann said, turning away from him and heading back to the Drift monitor.

"Right."

Newt settled back against Otachi's hide and she began her deep, rumbling purr again. It was better down on the ground with her than up on her head. He closed his eyes and listened as Hermann powered up the machine and began clicking away at the attached computer. A low buzz started up, pulsing out from the electrodes, and Otachi stirred. Newt could feel their bond strengthen, shifting from the back of his head up to the forefront, and he could actually feel _Hermann_ flitting around the edges of his mind.

"Okay that's a _bit_ unexpected," Hermann said. "I can feel both of you."

"Yeah, sorry. How long do we have to do this for?" Newt asked.

"The larger the sample the better. Can you both try and reach out to the Kaiju hive mind?"

Newt obeyed, sucking in a tight breath as a flood of Otachi's animalistic thoughts pushed through his mind. "Holy shit. I can't tell if it's just her or the actual hive mind."

"That's fine, just keep doing that as long as you can stand it...or however long _I_ can," Hermann said.

Newt's fingers curled into fists as he tried to hang onto Otachi's stream of thought. It was one thing to just _feel_ her there, emotions and thoughts as a quiet background noise, but actually latching on? It felt like the first few months when he first started Ghost Drifting with Otachi. Back when he thought he was going crazy. Before Hannibal-

Otachi growled, both in his mind and beside him. He yanked his thoughts away from that entire part of his life and reached out to pat her arm in what he could only hope was a soothing matter.

"Could you _not_ think about your mobster boyfriend for three seconds?" Hermann asked.

"Yeah, yeah, sorry," Newt said. "Can we be done now?"

Hermann cut the power and Newt went slack against Otachi, sliding down to sit on the ground. He reached up a trembling hand and yanked the sensors off. Apparently even a low level Drift was enough to make him dizzy with vertigo, unable to tell whose eyes he was seeing out of. He closed his eyes tight and curled into Otachi's hulking form. He listened to the pulse of her heartbeat, unsure if it was something he was hearing or something she'd projected into his head. His breathing slowly came back in line with the calm rate of her heartbeat.

"Newton. Newton. Are you okay? Can you hear me?" Hermann asked.

Newt nodded and forced himself to uncurl and sit back up, every muscle shaking from how tense he'd been. "Yeah, I'm good. All here. Just. Shit."

"What should I do? Do you need anything?"

"Kinda wanna talk to my mobster boyfriend," Newt said.

"You haven't spoken with him yet?" Hermann asked.

"No, I didn't want to chance pissing her off but..." Newt braced himself against Otachi's side and got to his feet. "Whatever. Your choice." He patted Otachi. "Either I go see him or I call him. Just because you're a big scary monster doesn't mean I don't have my rights."

Otachi gave a low growl and he got a general feeling that at this point, she didn't really care because both options sucked.

"Alright, great talk." Newt pushed away from her. "You know where I can find Hannibal?"

"Yes, of course. Let me just make sure Miss Mori has all the data we gathered," Hermann said. "I think it'd be best if we don't have to do a repeat of this."

Newt glanced at Otachi, who had stretched out across the ground and closed her eyes. "Yeah..."

           

-.-

 

Hermann led him to the old K-Science lab which looked big without all their old equipment and samples crowded into ever nook and cranny. Hannibal stood beside one of the computers at the back of the room next to a woman in a lab coat who, at first glance, Newt didn't recognize. Then she turned, expression lighting up when she saw him.

"Dr. Geiszler, a pleasure," she said, holding out a hand for him to shake.

"Oh my God, Dr. Lightcap, I am so, so honored to meet you face to face, I just..." Newt swallowed hard to stop the flood of words and shook her hand. "Sorry."

"No, no, it's fine. You can call me Caitlin," she said. "Hannibal was just telling me about how the last few months have gone for you with the Ghost Drifting you experienced with Otachi before she well...came back through the Breach."

Hannibal hung back behind Caitlin and his expression was unreadable behind his shades. Newt understood that he was good at not letting anyone see what he was thinking, and he got that it was a skill that allowed him to become one of the most powerful mob bosses in the world, but it was still a bit frustrating to not see his concern. He pushed those thoughts away though and refocused on Caitlin.

"Yeah, in hindsight I supposed I should have contacted you. If anyone is going to know about how the Drift works it'd be the person who invented it," Newt said.

"Well, we're all here now," she said. "So no harm done, not really. Miss Mori has set me up here so I've started looking over the data. I was hoping Dr. Gottlieb could help me too, but if Otachi is letting you be away from her I wouldn't mind your help as well."

"Yeah, sure but could I maybe...shower first? And you know, catch up with Hannibal?"

"I'm sure we can spare the time," she said, glancing at Hermann who shrugged his agreement. "We'll be here when you return."

"Right, thanks," Newt said.

He glanced over at Hannibal and then turned to head out of the lab. He didn't check to see if Hannibal was following. When he got out into the hallway and the lab door slid shut behind him, he didn't even have a chance to formulate any sort of sentence before Hannibal grabbed his arm and turned him around.

"Hannib-"

Newt's words were cut off as Hannibal hugged him tight, quick enough that he ended up with a mouthful of red suit fabric. He twisted away and spat it out before propping his chin on Hannibal's chest and looking up at him. He wiggled one of his arms out of Hannibal's grasp and then plucked his shades off.

"Just confirming how worried you are," Newt said, looking up into his eyes.

The scarred eye was cloudy and expressionless but his right eye was bright and full of more emotion than Newt has seen in a long while. Hannibal was actually _scared_. Newt reached up with both hands to cup Hannibal's face and the older man sighed and closed his eyes. He curled forward and wrapped Newt even closer. Newt twisted his arms around Hannibal's neck before burying his face in Hannibal's chest and _fuck_ , he hadn't even realized how scared _he_ was until he started feeling safe again.

They stood there for a long time, just clinging to each other. The feeling that had been building for so long in his chest (the _love,_ not that he'd ever say it out loud), forced its way to the forefront of his mind. He twisted his fingers in the fabric of Hannibal's suit. He wanted to burrow his way inside Hannibal, wanted to feel safe _all_ the time, wanted to know Hannibal would always be there and always care and always try to protect him.

"Well shit..." Newt said, wiping his face with Hannibal's shirt as he started to cry. "I guess it's all getting to me."

"Yeah." Hannibal's voice was hoarse and Newt could feel his shoulders shaking. "Yeah, me too. She still making all that noise in your head?"

"Not right now," Newt said. He dropped his arms to wrap around Hannibal's waist. "I guess she's happier now that she can come get me herself. Whatever. I just.." _love you_ "...need a nap."

Hannibal snorted. "Let's get you cleaned up first then."

Newt nodded and clung a little tighter.


End file.
